If you are coming from Building Heavenly Bridges (BHB), WELCOME and if you are finding me for the first time and looking for support after a loss, then please check me out at my grief/loss blog!

This blog is a series of anecdotes from our life after losing our first child, a stillborn daughter, then going on to birth the two other lights of our lives!

Bear is 6: serious, organized, my cruise director and my time keeper.

The Comedian is 4: She is pure comedy always doing something unintentionaly funny that I attempt to put into words.

Enjoy our stories, conversations, and delights as we embrace the lives of our second and third daughters without ever negating our first.

Children's Widsom - Quote of the week...

Children's Widsom - Quote of the week...
"I Wish Emma Was Alive Because I Would Tell Her Where The Bathroom Is"

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Show and Tell - Teaching Tolerance (UPDATED with A Vocabulary Lesson)

BARBARA WROTE: "Beautiful lesson, your lovely girls are going to grow up into such nice people.But Cara, I take exception to the word "tolerance"! You're teaching acceptance, much more comfortable to live with than tolerance!"


MY RESPONSE TO HER READ: "You know Barbara - you are exactly right...and until I read your comment I didn't realize that it read differently. See what I mean? Long standing gifts from the generations die hard, even with word choice!"



I write often enough about parenting after loss, a difficult and emotional task to be sure.
But what I haven't written much about is parenting in the 21st century. The melting pot that is this great United States of America gives us ample opportunity to teach our children the fundamentals of humankind: love, respect, personal choice, and tolerance just to name a few.

The biases of the previous generations are hitting a roadblock with us, the 'new age' parents, who embrace the opportunity to impart the building blocks of life: self respect, reverence for others, and emotional freedom.

I am not a politician, in fact the mere idea of politics in it's basest form wigs me out more than picking half hatched nits out of my children's gorgeous hair. I am, however, conviced that if we don't model these lifestrageties for our children, along with basic truths like you choose your experience, it is what it is, and exist in this moment, that the cyclical nature of old intolerances will remain embedded, indeed encouraged to a degree, to the upcoming generation we are molding.

Those of you that read here regularly know I live in Vermont. You may also know the recently passed law from my home state. We went to a wedding this weekend. This is the conversation I had with Bear the day before.

Me) Bear, remember earlier this summer we went to a wedding?

B) Yes, it was beautiful.

Me) It sure was. What did you like best about that wedding?

B) The colors. (It was a cross -cultural experience of Christian and Tibetan descents)

Me) I like the colors too. Why do you think they got married?

B) Because they love each other.

Me) Yes, they do love each other very much. So what do you think marriage is all about?

B) Loving, and celebrating, and spirit. Putting the spirit together and celebrating your love -- like you and daddy.

Me) Absolutely Bear. You are exactly right. When two people feel like their hearts talk to each other, that kind of love, they want to be together forever -- so they get married. And, at that wedding it was a man and a woman.

B) Yes, the princess was so pretty!

Me) And, sometimes a woman and a woman get married.

B) Are they from a different country?

Me) No. They are from the United States, in fact - they live in Vermont, like you.

B) Does that mean sometimes a man and a man get married too?

Me) Yes. That's exactly what it means, if they have that special forever kind of love.

B) Who's getting married tomorrow?

These two lovely ladies held one of the first legal ceremonies in the State of Vermont, and I consider our family lucky to have been there to witness, then celebrate their love.
And their amazing cake!

And their 'off the hook' first dance. It's Apparently it's all the current rage and worth a click over!

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Show and Tell: At Least They Don't Have Wings

That's what my pastor said about the lice Comedian came home with, "At least God gave them a weakness or we'd ALL have them!"

Currently, you would be hard pressed to convice me why he created them at all... I mean, they don't really serve a purpose except to cause a known-to-be patient mother to choose to pull out her OWN hair in frustration that she has to force her child to endure yet another sitting of 'just checking'! Even so, she does look pretty damn cute, no?

In case you need a reminder of her 'former do', check the sidebar!! And, spare me a little golf clap as I did it myself. Well, if you count putting it in a ponytail and cutting, then attempting to shape a little so it didn't look so uneven.

Oh, we were canning corn today.

After the tomatoes of last week...

And Jer went crazy on the green beans, turnips, carrots and who knows what else the weekend I was away.

That's my life right now. Work, preserving, and nit picking!

What are you showing and telling?

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Show and Tell - The Art of the Quickie

Um...no - don't go there. This is a parenting after loss blog after all!

But my DSL connection is reallllllly slow tonight and so, here goes a quickie S and T of the GIRL's weekend...(updated to say that my connection died last night so a morning post it is!)

Bear's Bag

Comedian's bag

Two really excited girls to go to two really fun sleepovers for the weekend!!! Yeah - no mommy and daddy for 48 whole hours!! (seriously - they didn't even say a real goodbye to us, just ran an played with their friends!)
They made bears at their Nana and Papa's house. Must.Show.Off

Bear named hers "EmmaBear" - my heart melted.
Comedian passed out. The aftereffects of a really FUN weekend!
So, that's that for my driveby show and tell...what is everyone else showing?